How to Win Friends & Influence People was first published in 1936 and even today it’s still a best seller. It’s the first book about human relations I’ve ever read and I really enjoyed it. It points out the principles of how to deal with people with easy real life examples which makes the book not just educational but entertaining. The most important principles are put to the beginning whereas the more advanced ones you’ll find rather to the end. That’s useful because you’ll get to know the best stuff right away. Regardless what’s your profession I believe this book is very valuable to everyone.
Just by googleing the title you’ll find the principles e.g. at Wikipedia:
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want….Six Ways to Make People Like You
1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a man’s Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in the terms of the other man’s interest.
6. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
1. Avoid arguments.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never tell someone they are wrong.
3. If you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Start with questions the other person will answer yes to.
6. Let the other person do the talking.
7. Let the other person feel the idea is his/hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
9. Sympathize with the other person.
10. Appeal to noble motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to other people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes first.
4. Ask questions instead of directly giving orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise every improvement.
7. Give them a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Encourage them by making their faults seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
Still I encourage everyone to read the book. You will only understand the principles by reading the stories.
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Thanks for this summary! I’d say, though, that many of the later concepts are really the same as the earlier one’s just targeting different ears… Check out this reader’s guide I wrote. I think you’ll appreciate it!
http://www.howtoreachmygoals.com/2009/12/02/1147/how-to-win-friends-and-influence-people-a-readers-guide/